the triple barrel name numbskulls

through somebodies idiotic meddling of time and space
with an annoying time machine (lets not play the blame game, I might lose)
the world had been reset

I awoke in a strange medieval town, cobbled streets and all, but it seemed greener,
with a few benches here and there, then I noticed john and jim sitting at one of the benches with a table

"hello" I said
"who the fuck are you" they replied

I explained that I was a chum of theres and I tried to prove it,
I took them into ye olde medieval vinyl shoppe and picked out some jazz

"here you go" I said to jim, knowing that no one else in the entire world likes spazz, I mean jazz, so he believed me and my time machine mess up explaination

john being angry didnt believe me and stormed home to put "gay against you"'s "electric face wound" on repeat in his medieval gingerbread cottege in the town square where everyone hung out, he left the window open

me and jim walked down hill and saw ex-PE teacher mr clelland pushing washing machines into the medieval mall, we followed him in to his white good haven

it was rather open plan so we waited for his assistant to leave before we harassed him

"what are you doing" I asked

"ive opened a laundrette and I marry people on the side while I wait for the clothes to dry" he replied

thinking It bizzare and not believing him I asked
"if you can marry people then marry me and jim then"

he turned red and annoyed at the prospect, this made it even more fun, he knew he had to do it, so he did it,

we werent that bothered because it wasnt like in hollyoaks and we wouldnt be going to prison for lying, and we werent from albania, whats more it would look on the old CV, married and all that

so he wed us and we left laughing at how low he had become and at the prospect of all the mischief we could cause

we walked back up hill, past the ye olde medieval vinyl shop, they were selling yellow birds outside now for some reason, must be a medieval thing....

we went to the town square where we met alot of people that didnt believe us, some found it hillarious as we did, the other side of the town square was some sort of bread outlet, bit over the top with the orange decorations

then I heard "electric face wound" blarring out johns open window, and I began screaming along to the words, chucking bread in at him and other people joined in, all we heard was a crash and and a bang and a "ARGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGH"

it was hilarious, but then we all had to stop as it was time for us to go to medieval college